Gold is the Result of Hurt

2 Corinthians 4:8-9

We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.

I’ve always grown up in a family where your private issues were just that…private. You didn’t blab them to everybody you could find. If you needed help, you went to someone in the family and asked for prayer and support, you didn’t make it public knowledge. Rarely do I share my struggles with people unless I feel my struggles will help them come to a deeper relationship with God.

I have been struggling with my self-image for about 7 months now. I have always been small and never had to worry about what I ate in order to stay that way. Back in March of this year (2016) I had a health issue catch up with me. A misdiagnoses caused me to have greater issues with what was actually wrong with me. I gained 40 pounds in two months due to this health issue. None of my clothes fit, I was having to wear my husband’s clothes just to be able to go out of the house. Dieting and working out were barely budging my weight or my current circumstances. I have felt defeated, so very defeated. I didn’t want to leave the house or see people I knew because I didn’t want anybody to see me in the state I was in. I didn’t want to be judged or treated differently. My close friends and family kept telling me that I was pretty and that I shouldn’t feel that way

. No dip, I know I shouldn’t feel that way but I did and I do. The worst thing you can say to somebody is that they should knock it off. When somebody is truly going through something that is emotionally and psychologically heavy, don’t tell them to knock it off. They don’t want to be feeling the way they are. They hate the feeling and just need somebody to say, “I understand. I will be here to support you the entire way.” Acknowledging the issue and being honest about the circumstances is the best way to level with someone and show them you’re at their level. I hate it when people go on and on about how I'm totally not overweight or state similar phrases. Trying to dismiss the obvious only makes it harder.

For me, being overweight and being unable to quickly fix it is very difficult. It weighs on me every day and tears roll down my face as I work out because I just hurt but if I don’t push through the hurt, my circumstances will never change. So, I suppose there are two things that God is teaching me through this. Don’t dismiss what someone is feeling or going through even if it doesn’t seem big to us. Further, when God is working in our lives, it’s not always going to be sunshine and roses. Sometimes it hurts and only if we push through that hurt will we see the reward at the end. A lot of things hurt in life but a lot of us are better for those hurts in the end. Let God carry you through your hurt and it’s ok to actually acknowledge the hurt is there and weighing on you, just don’t let it make you quit. Never quit because then you’re not only giving up on yourself but you’re giving up on God.

Job 23:10

But He knows the way I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.

The Hidden Story

Matthew 25:40 - The King will reply, “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”

I’m sure we’re all used to the phrase, “Don’t judge, you don’t know their story.” However, people rarely live by this and it’s most often heard when somebody doesn’t want to stop the destructive behavior they’re taking part in. Either way, it’s a legit line and I really feel like we miss the deepest aspect of it. My husband and I were driving through Springfield yesterday which is a large city. There are always career panhandlers at specific corners trying to meet their daily quota with whatever sob story they’ve contrived. I was still sad for them. This annoyed my husband that I would have pity on those who were basically stealing from kindhearted folks just wanting to lend a helping hand. He understood once I explained what was running through my thoughts. Those career panhandlers got there somehow. How did they grow up or what did they go through that made them decide to be that lying, swindling person on the side of the road? What caused them to rather don ratty clothes and look dirty and unkempt in order to try and get money instead of get a job? Are they capable of getting a job or did they resort to panhandling because they ran out of options and gave up? Even when we think we have the story figured out about someone, you would be surprised how wrong many of us are. Don’t ever think you know the entire story behind someone’s suffering even if that suffering presents itself as an atrocity to any average person. Before you turn your nose up at the drunk on the side of the road wanting more money, stop and think about a few reasons why he might be there. You see all the videos on Facebook and I know a lot of you either cry or are deeply touched. If it helps, play it out in your head like one of those videos if that’s what it takes. You know, everyone is talking about the presidential candidates and usually it’s negative. Pointing out how horrible they are because of this this and this. It annoys the ever living snot out of me. Every single one of us would look just as horrible if we were under a microscope. Does that mean I agree with all of their actions? Definitely not. However, was I there? Did I see what happened in person? Have I met them myself? No, which means I’m taking all of my info from a secondhand source which is popularly the media. We ALL know the media has a great way of twisting things. They’re all about drama. Stop going through life with your “I’m going to find every reason I can to be negative” cap on. Stop and feel. Stop and let your mind wander to the other side of things and allow your heart to feel what it is that these people have gone through or may be currently going through. Let your eyes look at people how Jesus would look at people. He didn’t seem them as their mistake, He saw them as the scared and lost person they are. Mentally they’re sitting in a corning shivering, begging, searching, needing. As Christians, we’re to remedy this and show them a warmth and grace that changes their lives forever. So, the next time you see a man or woman stealing, don’t snarl, pray. The next time you want to bash the presidential candidates, pray for them and our country, both are under a lot of pressure. Stop and feel. Stop and pray. It’s that simple.

Galatians 6:2 - Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Standing Up for Love

1 John 3:16-18 - This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

So, I have waited a long time to post about this. There is so much controversy connected with this issue that it frightens me to my core to mention it. Why? Bullying. I’m not one to be confrontational and when confrontational subjects come up, those on the other side of your opinion tend to bully you. However, even if it’s going to hurt, I will say what the Lord leads me to say. So, before I talk about this, I beg of you to just please, sit back, relax, and read with an open and loving heart. If you are in an agitated state or you’re feeling opinionated, now is not the time to read this post. It has taken me months to write this because I know many of my personal and close friends might not even agree but I need everyone including them to please read what I have to say. God has been speaking to my heart in a very deep way about this matter. I speak to Christian women alone as I cannot expect those who are not Christians to hold to a standard that is not theirs, although I would pray that they read with an open heart as well.

Breastfeeding. There, I said. Please take a deep breath before reading on. If we are sisters (brothers, if you are reading) in Christ, you will listen to the word the Lord has spoken to me, not as me speaking but as the Lord is speaking. Breastfeeding in public in general is not wrong in the slightest. A child needs to eat and yes, it’s a lovely bond between a mother and a child. It’s just the beginning of how close we will become to our mothers and realize how much we depend on their loving affection and nurturing. We need them from the moment we open our eyes. It has become a very touchy and taboo subject about mothers who breastfeed in public, but bare themselves for anyone around to see while they do it. Take another deep breath here and please remember to put opinions and such aside for now. In this day and age, there are many ways to avoid baring a breast in order to breastfeed. I have heard all the arguments, it’s hot, it’s dirty, would you want to eat under that, etc. I understand your frustration, not as a mother, because I’m not one, but as a sister in Christ because I can see your struggle as a mother and all the things you deal with. I have an older sister who has two beautiful little girls. One is only a few months old. I have watched my sister, who is a very busy woman, gracefully handle her breastfeeding. I respect and commend her in a day when she could get away with doing it however she likes, she chooses to do it privately, no matter what she has to do. We are in a band together and have to play shows from time to time. She runs a firework stand for a month out of the year which requires long hours. Let me tell you, both are hot and both make it very difficult to breastfeed. Not once did she complain about going into a car or private area. She wanted to do it privately. Why would somebody go through that much trouble when our society has made it to where she doesn’t have to? Reverence for the Lord and His people. That’s the bottom line.

I am currently getting my master’s in criminal justice. I have to do a lot of psychology work within this degree which I enjoy greatly. However, there are some things I learn that break my heart. For instance, the number one aspect that connects 99% of serial killers is porn. Ted Bundy, one of the most well-known serial killers this world has ever known, murdered over 30 women and girls. He had a normal life. He grew up in a Christian home that was as perfect as it gets. He even spoke this in an interview with Dr. Dobson, that there was nothing whatsoever in his childhood that pushed him to be the way he was. He said it all started with a department store magazine, the ones where women and men are in their panties just for modeling purposes. I say “just” for modeling purposes because that seems pretty mild doesn’t it? Ted Bundy was a normal man. He didn’t have any major psychological issues or major issues at home to push him over the edge. He was, for all intents and purposes, any other man you’re surrounded by every day. An addiction gripped him though. An addiction, like drugs, began to control him and he couldn’t get enough of it. There are millions of men who suffer the same addiction that is porn. It’s easily accessible and nudity seems to be anywhere we look. Ted Bundy, back in 1989 before he was put to death, begged people to please stay away from the callousness that was creeping into the world. The nudity, the violence, the blindness to one’s “simple” actions. He said that we have no idea how many people like him, normal people, are walking around without anyone having any idea how they’re being affected by simple things such as panty models.

Christian women, this is where I’m begging you, please, think about what your simple actions may cause someone. None of us ever mean to be the cause of someone’s downfall and none of us will ever like to admit that we can cause someone to turn into something as bad as Ted Bundy. He’s an extreme case that occurred back in the 80’s but we all know society has gotten a lot worse and extreme. Some aren’t even hiding their atrocities anymore. They wave them like proud flags. I bawl my eyes out while typing this because we can be such callous people. We are so stuck on our own agendas that we are too blind to see what our “fight” might be doing to others. Christian women, do you love your brothers in Christ? Do you truly love them as God would? Then please put the breast away. Be modest about the beautiful thing the Lord gave you. Yes, it’s so very hard taking care of that little one but add something to their world that will further protect them from evil rather than add to the callousness that produces evil. Yes, it can be hot, cold, dirty, upsetting, but you’re giving little sacrifices for a short while that will bless the little one in your arms. Through tears I beg of you to please not be a stumbling block using something so beautiful. When you post bare breasted women on your social media in your fight to stand up for breastfeeding it’s like watching an R rated movie and it soils the beauty of such a wonderful gift. Love your Christian brothers enough to step back and say, “I understand why my bare breasts, feeding or not, can be a stumbling block.” Be overjoyed to be doing this! Be elated that you are taking a step against this crazy world where anything goes anymore. Sure, they will have access to this junk other places but to be a part of the solution is amazing, no matter how small it may seem. My sister has been able to bless and witness to so many people through her willingness to be different. She doesn’t have to, she wants to, and that is what makes all the difference. Love is everything. So, please, Christian women with beautiful babies, be the first to take a step in mending this society. Jesus died on a cross for us to mend us and make us whole and to bless us beyond imagining. I pray that a little discomfort is worth it to you in order to bless others as well because that’s what being a Christian is all about. Please, don’t search for loopholes that you can argue, or comment with something that’s been heard a million times. Just please read and let the words the Lord spoke to me sink in.

Ephesians 4:2 – Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.

Too Much Entertainment, Yo!

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. ~ Colossians 3:2

I’m really bad about eaves dropping. I’ll admit it. I’m a talker but in a big crowd I stay very quiet because I hate big crowds. At these moments, I’m able to get tid bits from various conversations. It’s like flipping through channels on TV. “Too much drama, boring, boring, sports, Disney, boring, boring, ohhhhh, what do we have here?” Yes, that’s exactly how it goes in my head. Anyways, you would be surprised at how some of these little overheard conversations can inspire us orrrr not so much. It’s usually the not so much and you sometimes would like to hand out a tongue lashing but you have to remember you were eaves dropping. Oops. I overheard a conversation one time that seriously made me take a second look at how I view church. There was a small group of teens discussing the youth services at their church. One of them thought the youth leader was attractive which was a little comical to me. However, the topic came up about some of them getting bored with church. They felt that the youth pastors weren’t doing enough to entertain them or keep their interest. Their exact words were, “There needs to be more action, more lights, or something.” I got a little annoyed at first but then I realized, wasn’t I just complaining to myself about routines? I’ve been going to church since I was born. I’ve not moved around on churches very often. Right now, I help run a youth outreach and the responsibilities can get heavy because there are few to help. I went through a faze where I felt I wasn’t getting enough out of the service. Listening to that conversation made me realize that I was being a big baby. I don’t go to church to be entertained and it definitely is not meant to entertain us. Church is a place where we can learn and spend time with other Christians as a way to stay encouraged and ready for the crap life can throw at us. Church is sure as heck not a movie theatre or a concert where we need to be entertained twice a week. If YOU want to get something out of church, it is up to YOU. Open up and truly listen to the words. Shoot, you may not agree but there’s still learning in not agreeing with something a pastor has to say. It is not a pastor’s job to say something you will always agree with or to say something that will tickle your fancy. When you walk into church, forget about everything and just focus on God. Let Him wash over you and ready you for walking back out that door to face life. We don’t need entertainment for that, we just need to be still and quit focusing on ourselves so much and focus on God. Gathering as the church always meant focusing on the worship of God, not on the worship of ourselves and the need for entertainment. Don't get me wrong, music, lights, and dancing isn't wrong to have in the church, it's when it becomes our sole focus and we can't have church without it that it becomes a hindrance. 

What is the outcome then, brethren? When you assemble, each one has a psalm, has a teaching, has a revelation, has a tongue, has an interpretation Let all things be done for edification. ~ 1 Corinthians 14:26

Cast Your Net

"He said, 'Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.' When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish." ~ John 21:6 NIV

So, it’s been a while since I’ve posted on my blog. Funny thing is, I work for other bloggers but their blogging is quite a bit different than mine. I guess I could say that I’m still old school and only like to use my blog for my thoughts. They’ve moved on to modern times and use their blogs for more useful purposes. For now, I’m just going to yack away because the Lord knows I’m good at yacking. Anyways, since I’ve been working as a virtual assistant, I’ve had to learn a completely different method to finding work. You have to offer a topic and a service and hope the right person sees it and jumps on it. Other times, you could post and it’s like crickets, if there could be crickets on Facebook. My husband decided to get involved with my little business and add in his expertise which allowed us to up our money goal for the month. Our game was strong, let me tell you. However, one month it will be awesome and then the next month it will be extremely difficult to reach our goals. We recently had one of those months and I wasn’t sure what to do. One night, I felt God speaking to me about posting and offering a specific topic in the form of how-to articles. This hadn’t worked in the past so I really didn’t want to waste my time. God spoke to my heart and said, “Cast your net, trust me.” So…. I did. Holy grapes, you guys, it worked! Imagine that. I had a blogger who was ecstatic about it within minutes and we ended up earning hundreds of dollars off the deal. I’m not the only one this can happen to and God doesn’t stop at blogging articles. Our God is so big that He can provide for us if we just trust Him to. We have to listen and do our part and He will provide in His time. We did more than meet our goal that month and every month since then. I cannot tell you what a blessing it is to feel God’s provision in my life. Just knowing that if I do my best and listen, I have nothing to worry about. For the first time in my life, I am not worried about money. We’re not rich but we’re definitely not poor and I have God to thank for every little bit of it. Don’t be afraid to cast your nets, guys!

"Then Jesus declared, 'I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.'" ~ John 6:35